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PostSubject: Wrong or Right?   Wed Dec 16, 2009 1:56 pm

okay, I don't know it I am wrong or right in this situation...I have my mom telling me I am wrong but I also know right from wrong and my instinct is telling me that I am right. Heres the Story...

So my mom use to be best friend with this older lady named Bonnie. Bonnie was little...senile and weird and kept going back with her EX husband who beat her badly and she never cleaned her house, mice covered the house with the mounds of garbage piled high...she had no running water or a fridge and she was really poor, could barley afford her taxes but still bought 500 dollar bracelets or 100's of dollars in clothes she only wore once because she couldn't wash them and she even had a ketchup bottle that was so old the ketchup turned black. Well she kept begging and begging for help so my moms other best friend (Bonnies Neighbor) my mom knew her since grade-school, she tells Bonnie that she will buy her a refrigerator and any one she wants no matter the price. Well I guess Bonnie said No, she would just take cash for it instead and get it when she had the time...which made no sense because this lady was offering to buy her a fridge, take her to store to get it and help with the delivery. Well that kind of caused a rift because then the lady said she wanted just money didn't want the fridge and a few month went by and they started fighting, he'd clean up leaves and she'd start throwing them back in his yard, expecting more and more money which she used to by more worthless junk like clothes or jewelry. So during the big fight breaker, this Bonnie calls my mom and wanted her to pick sides so my mom picked the lady who wasn't making her pick sides, side. So the friendship ended...Well then it came time for this lady's son's graduation last year and Bonnie never bothered to send him a card or anything, when she saw them out in public...she'd be stuck up (according to my moms friend) sooo a few years later...its time for my graduation and I get a card in the mail from this Bonnie with a graduation gift inside and my mom got mad saying she should leave things alone shouldn't of done that. So I asked to send a Thank You card and she said No... were not getting back involved with that lady and she shouldn't of sent me nothing.

I'm sitting here thinking...Bonnie was nice enough to send me a gift after all these years and still remember my graduation and still sent a gift and a card...I thought it was very nice and thoughtful and I am thinking...mom drop the stupid grudge...nobody cares about that anymore. Whats past is past...They are both in the wrong and least Bonnie isn't taking it out on the innocent one (me). So I really feel and think that I should send her a Thank You card and that in this I am in the right and my mom is in the wrong.

What do you think...should I send a Thank You Card behind my mom's back? Should I not send one at all because my mom is in the right? My moms pretty set in her ways, you cant talk to her at all or make her understand, when you try she yells and goes on a rampage and tunes me out by doing something else. So talking to her about it is an option I tried that has failed.


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PostSubject: Re: Wrong or Right?   Wed Dec 16, 2009 2:28 pm

Proper social behavior suggests that if someone offers a greeting in any form, you should return the jesture with an approprate response.

When it all gets boiled down, Its not what someone else says you should do! You need to follow YOUR heart and do what you think is right ... that's what makes it right or wrong!

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PostSubject: Re: Wrong or Right?   Wed Dec 16, 2009 3:44 pm

Well I would say to give her a thank you card. Your mom isn't the one sending it and it would be wrong to drag you into the middle of this so there shouldn't really be a problem. The only other reason why I would think a Thank You card is probably not needed is if this other person sent you the gift simply to spite your mom. But since you can't know for sure I would go with what is the polite thing to do.


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